This Flight Attendant’s Ultimate Message is a Lesson in Emotional Intelligence

That date has come and gone, of course. And American Airlines’ Breaunna Ross is now one of the affected employees.

Given that fact and her final assignment, the 29-year-old flight attendant delivered a heartfelt message to passengers this week – one that was taped and quickly went viral.

Ross could have been angry, or angry, or railing against the injustice of the world. It wouldn’t have been the first time that employees react badly when they lose a job. Some people would have understood.

Instead, she did the opposite. And her testimony, filled with compassion, grace and emotional intelligence, is worth unpacking – perhaps even emulating the next time you find yourself in a similarly difficult situation.

Let’s examine Ross’ statement, examine the context, and find out why it worked so powerfully.

If you don’t read any further, however, here’s the big advantage: she shared a message from the heart that made it easy for her to empathize, but she still managed to tell the story about her audience as opposed to just herself .

“I thank each of you personally.”

Here is an excerpt from Ross’ message. I embedded the video at the end of this article:

“As you all know, the aviation industry is badly affected by this global pandemic … For me and one other crew member on our flight today, this means that we will be on vacation on October 1st and unfortunately this was my last work flight before that day comes.

I would also like to personally thank each and every one of you for choosing today to fly Americans. …

This job was an escape for me … a job that opened up a lot of opportunities for me, a job that I fell in love with. I’ve been to places I never thought I’d get the chance … I’ve met people from all walks of life and made friends that will last the rest of my life.

To my family at American Airlines, thank you very much for taking a risk for me two and a half years ago. …

Finally today I have one final request for each of you. With so much going on in the world, you never know how small actions can affect the next person. Please be kind to one another, practice compassion for everyone, and live with acceptance from yourself and others. “

“And until I see you again in the friendly sky, please take care of yourself and your health.”

Why does it work so well? First and foremost for authenticity – her voice breaks, she is emotional but calm, and as a result, it is easy to feel empathy for her. But I also think there are some other important points.

It expresses gratitude

Ross’ statement is about 400 words (less than half the length of this article), and she thanks you for at least five different things that I counted. She thanks American Airlines for the risk and attitude, her colleagues for the good employees and friends, and her passengers for the decision to fly Americans again and again.

In almost every situation there are always things to be thankful for. The fact that Ross could identify and articulate them, and spend so much time focusing on them, made their message really unifying.

She reflects the positive

Ross also spent much of her message talking about the positive things that came out of working at American Airlines: the opportunity to see parts of the world she wouldn’t otherwise have, the people she worked with, and friendships she made, and even the fact that it was an “escape” from another post-college job that she hadn’t enjoyed.

Of course, she recognizes the major drawbacks: the global pandemic, the fact that thousands of airline employees are losing their jobs, etc. Much like the gratitude she expressed, passengers made it easy to feel empathy for them when they move focused on the positive attitude.

She offers warmth and asks for help

Ross said in her message that she “had already started” [her] next chapter. “(In a separate public Facebook post, she announced that she was going to school to become a beautician.) However, she made it clear that many of her colleagues do not know what they are going to do next and asked passengers about her to keep in her mind.

She did another very effective thing: she asked the passengers to recognize that everyone is under stress during these times.

“Be kind to one another,” she said, “practice compassion for everyone and live with acceptance from you and others … and until I see you again in the friendly sky, please take care of yourself and your health.”

She continues her job

This is the part that could so easily be missed. Ross’ viral message was brief. She worked the rest of the time on the flight.

In a separate Facebook post, she talked about her pride and emotions in getting her uniform ready beforehand.

And remember, she didn’t say a word about it being her last day until she went through all of the professional things she had to do first: welcome passengers to Dallas and give them information about the gate where they will arrive and where to get their checked bags, etc.

This is one of the most emotionally intelligent parts of the whole story. Even though Ross tells a story that affects her, she thinks about how it all affects her passengers. For all the empathy they undoubtedly had for them, their first job was to make sure they were comfortable, safe, and informed when they reached Dallas.

People noticed. In fact, as I was finishing this article, Ross was writing that she received a call from Doug Parker, CEO of American Airlines, who also noticed.

Apparently, she said, he was still in a Washington hotel room, hoping to win Congress to a last-minute deal and save some airline jobs.

The opinions expressed by Inc.com columnists here are their own, not those of Inc.com.

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